Ghazals..

..I dont understand them, but there’s google for that.

In Infosys, information security regulations have really tightened over last 3-4 years, Im told. So, most of us music enthusiasts are enslaved by what our forfathers aka ex-software engineers, now PLs/PMs uploaded on the network back in the day. So when you join a team here and get your cubicle, a huge folder labelled “Music” finds its way on your hard drive via some friend. After you filter it for filthy britney pop/westlife/all that jazz, and mind you that’s a gargantuan task, there is still much left.

you find a lot of vintage stuff, all genres. When i moved to chandigarh, a friend passed another huge folder i earlier did not have- ghazals. to put it mildly, I’ve been bloody hooked last 2 months. That’s all i hear. I’ve actually googled chitra singh’s ghazals (mirza ghalib written) to figure stuff out, but all i can say is that before this, i was missing out on some exquisite poetry. it will take the bob dylans and led zeps of the west another century to get there. Make that two. (i like dylan btw)

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Job ratings and relationships

It’s nine in the night and I’m sitting here in office, glued to my chair. Waiting for roomie to wrap up work so we can go home. I got a salary hike today. Very little but enough to bring spring in my steps. *Jump! Infact I was actually planning things out before I realized a. I’m not on the job too long (well, hopefully) b. its not so much money. Anyways, doesn’t take too much money to make this middle-class boy happy.

Some important things have happened of late. Not events, just things. Difficult to put my finger on them or tag them. Of the more important things, has been my eventual coming-to-terms with my actual expectations from my career.

I recently had my appraisal meeting. I would say it was a moderate rating, definitely not best-in-class. But amidst all those quantizations of human existence and grades flying around, I saw that my manager is really fond of me. The appraisal meeting was more of a chat session. Then few days later, my senior manager had an appraisal review meeting. She did not talk about a thing from work, just general sweet stuff. (At this juncture I must clarify that this blog is not a gratification exercise, I really feel this!) At the end of that 5 minute review, some heavy thoughts took me over. One being, it will be tough to tell my manager that I’m going, whenever it is, because she really likes me! And I do too! You see I am this non-competitive guy in the team who never snatches another person’s issues, never ccs another tester’s mistakes in a plan to the manager, who knows how to talk to developers about the errors in their code without offending them, rather making sure some laughs are shared on both ends. Maybe I am this way because I’m on this job solely to learn and not make a career. But that’s how it is.

But I’ve learnt that wherever I spend the next 20 years of my life, it has to be a place where I can build relationships. Not cut-throat-I-lose-you-trail. Maybe escapism but I don’t want to spend my life proving myself to those who don’t matter, which seems to be the foundation of most corporate culture, if not all. Maybe I’m just unwise, maybe I’ll wisen up and learn better. But I hope I don’t.

In other news, Nimish (ex-roomie) has lost 20 kg in 5 months! Hes become Wipro’s brand ambassador for some health campaign. Talked to him, apparently he’s got totally hot ladies coming up to him asking for diet and exercise advice. Kamti sir has arrived.